and when will it Amend?

He shot dead his mother everyday. Father wasn’t much of one ever. Perhaps so, I don’t have a home. I have a tangible roof and four walls but. Strong enough. But no light, or a window even, to feel the truth. To escape. It’s always better to run away. And those who know or might have, know it is not craven to do so. In a way it is intrepid.
One can’t just walk away, you might comment. It isn’t a perfect world now, is it. I maybe fake but I want to. Walk miles away, far enough to make world believe I am dead, or I just vanished.
Leaving, may not be the most opportune, but is the best way. Not because you care but so because you are not well-brought enough. And still brave enough.

I could never decide or opt, in life in general. It always had been duress or a compromise. Most often than not the later. When at times I did, though, only to fail miserably at it.

So he hates life, himself and wants to die. So what. I’d chose to die if I had a gun. There are better ways of dying.

Who cares? No one.

I don’t care. I am not concerned. I hate and I want to be alone. A new world, my order.

O Hai.

Life always comes a full circle. And the circle has only one side. Ever since I could remember, mine has been a miserable fuck. Seriously, it has. I have been in a painful relationship that didn’t work out, when it was the one thing I wanted never to fail. And I have gone through periods of extreme melancholies and loneliness, in desperations for a savior. Most often than not, I see the world and everything circa a waste. Well, music has been a savior at all times. But yeah, I could have done a lot better with myself instead of complaining about the monotonous life of mine. I may be fake.

Things don’t necessarily go well all the time. They may get shoddier. And at certain times when things are going pretty well and you think that everything is going to be just fine, fuck, life anals you at that moment. And you are left to be eaten over by mice in the gutters.

So much trash for the very first post. As if I wanted any sane mind to read this anyways. Fuck you all.